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What’s Up Doc?

My family doctor had been one of my biggest supporters. He truly saw me and took my thoughts and opinions into consideration. He also had a background with helping those with chronic pain and was well aware of the misconceptions that is within the medical world when it comes to chronic pain, which is priceless for someone like me. He and I had a great relationship, we could joke around and banter back and forth. It made life feel so much smoother having him as an advocate in my life. (https://www.petiteflower.net/post/last-minute-turn)

He had casually told me one day that his wife was very unhappy living on the island and how they were looking for a possible transfer. He told me that it wasn’t his desire to leave and was hoping his wife would come around to staying. It made me feel a little worried about it but with it being such a big unknown, I knew it could be a long while before that could possibly happen, until it happened!


Covid had happened and he had called me to check in to see how I was doing which is when he gave me the big news that he’d be moving in a few months. He was someone that I truly appreciated and respected in my life and got attached to. I cried many tears with knowing what I would lose. “What am I going to do without you though? Will there be someone to take over your patients?” I asked him. “You have nothing to worry about, I’ve got a few doctors that I’m looking into taking my place. I’ve told the clinic that we are in desperate need of new doctors to help take the load. There is no way that they can let all of these people that need a doctor to oversee their medications be without a doctor.” I was trying to stay positive and hoped that what he said would be true but unfortunately all of his efforts became dead ends. He explained that the doctors that he had hoped would take over for him, had different plans and were specializing in other areas and were unable to.

I wrote him a letter and gave him a little gift on my last in person visit with him. I knew he’d be way too busy to look at it until later. I received an unexpected phone call from him which is when he thanked me for the gift and told me that I would be one of his patients that he would miss. He told me that he knew that I’m a fighter and that with my efforts, he felt that I would someday get forward motion in my journey. I tearfully thanked him again for all that he had done for me and also asked if he could put a note on my file to vouche for me, so that when the time came for my pain medication refill, I’d have him to back me. He said he would and then we said our goodbyes for the last time.

The time came for more pain medications and now without a family doctor, I became just like all the other walk in clinic patients. I explained whose patient I was and about the note but no doctor was willing to do a prescription refill for me. I kept on being sent elsewhere to other doctors, who were also noticeably frustrated that I was being slumped onto them to take the risk on me. It got scary and worrisome because these low dose pain meds are what has helped me function, to sleep, to go out with my family and friends, to take the edge off of my pain, and most importantly help support me while I was doing this new physiotherapy so that I could get more out of my life.

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